I have sat at my computer multiple times this week and just sat there... I want so bad to write on my blog because I love writing and I love my little space on the world wide web, but I honestly don't even know even know what to say anymore! I admit that I have allowed doubt to creep in and make me feel silly for even having a blog and writing.
Is anyone reading this anymore?
Do people find me interesting?
Does my happiness about life come off as annoying to others?
Those may seem like silly questions, but they are three of many that swirl around in my head whenever I think about updating my little space. This moment is a perfect example! I almost hit the backspace button and deleted this whole post before I even got started because I don't want to seem like I'm fishing for affirmations. Because I'm not searching for that! I'm just...writing. Haha! I enjoy writing! I have kept journals ever since I was a little girl. I would ramble on and on because I felt like I had so much to say. When I read things I have written in the past I feel a little silly and wonder why those thoughts seemed so important to me at the time, but, I really enjoy what I'm writing about in the moment and it helps me feel better to get things on paper...or in a post...so why not?!
One of the reasons why I haven't posted in over a month is because of my many doubts. I need to get over my fear of what people think and just start writing again for myself. I love looking back at the pictures I have posted of my life, my children, our vacations, family, etc. I have shared funny moments and I have also shared some of my worst. I need to remind myself that this is my space, for my own personal enjoyment, and if other people want to look in they are more than welcome to, and if they don't want to --- they don't want to! It's OK!
With all of that silliness being said, I am ready for new beginnings! There are some big changes that are going to take place next year and I would love to share them with my friends and family! I was telling Paul the other day that God works in mysterious ways. We should never, ever, ever put our life plans in pen because God likes to change things on you and you need to be able to erase some plans to make room in between for God's plans as well as your own. I haven't really learned that lesson yet, but that's OK! I'm enjoying the lesson. I sit back, laugh, and shake my head at His handiwork.
I will post more details soon, but right now I will just say that I'm thankful for new beginnings! I'm excited, happy, and anxious to get started on our new adventure! I can't wait to write about it!