Laughter is the Best Medicine

A merry heart doeth good like a medicine: but a broken spirit drieth the bones. Proverbs 17:22

My kids.  They make me laugh daily.  I probably annoy people by filling their Facebook walls with my stories of what my kids said or did "this time."   But I don't care!  I can't help but share my joy with others!

God has a way of using children to bless others when it is needed the most.  I was feeling really stressed the other day when my two-year-old ran into the room.  I couldn't help but laugh at my little superhero as he saved my day!  My worries melted away as I laughed at his costume and gave my little man a big hug and kiss. 

God has been giving me a lot of great gems about motherhood lately.

Goodies like:

Bad moments don't make bad mamas!

Or this one:

Feelings are indicators not dictators.

Little reminders that motherhood is overwhelming.  Sometimes we lose our cool, we mess up, we blow our tops.  So I started writing myself little notes and posted them by my desk.  The next time I feel overwhelmed and like I'm losing control, I look at my notes and read every. single. one.

Find the joy treasure.

When I feel myself falling into a pity party, I tell myself to find a joy treasure.  Something that happened during the day that made me really happy.  Maybe it was my quiet time with the Lord before the kids woke up, or maybe one of the kids said something really funny that made me laugh.  I find something that gave me joy and I dwell on that till the woe-is-me attitude goes away.  I even started a little tradition that my kids love to do at the dinner table!  We make a point of asking each individual what their favorite part of the day was.  The kids never forget and they make sure to ask every night. 

A merry heart is like a medicine.  Laughter warms you from the inside out.  Our bones are definitely not drying up around here with these kids!   

   

Sweet Sleep

It's 9:00 pm and the house is quiet. 

All the lights are off. Everyone is nestled in their beds sleeping soundly. Except for me. 

I lay in bed with multiple pillows tucked under my head so I'm sitting up, my reading glasses are on, and my iPad is just bright enough to not bug my husband . . . too much. 

As soon as my alarm goes off in the morning I'm thinking about when I will be able to sleep next. 

Do I have time for an afternoon nap? Maybe I can get the kids to bed early tonight so I can go to bed. 

But it never fails. Once I hug and kiss the last kid and turn all the lights off . . . my mind decides to wake up! I can't fall asleep because I'm thinking and planning and writing to do lists and even writing in my journal to get feelings off my chest and I want to watch one more episode of House Hunters and maybe, just maybe, I will indulge and snack on something and drink my sweet tea in peace -- or iced coffee which is the coffee I started in the morning but finally gave up on finishing it because I was constantly interrupted. 

Not that this ever happens. :-) 

I search Pinterest for ideas on how to decorate my home for the holidays, my next meal for my family, maybe some DIY projects. I write down things I want to do, buy, make, etc. Then I look up organizing tips because I need help. Again, I write down things to help me stay organized. I look up party ideas as I daydream about throwing fun get togethers "just because" and inviting people over so they can ooh and ahh over all the little details I put together to make the party perfect.  I write down a list of holidays I can have people over for. Then I lay there thinking about how I left the house in disarray. I'm too tired to get up and clean, but now I can't sleep thinking about the messy state in which my house is in. I write down a detailed to do list of what I want to get done around the house the next morning. 

After writing multiple lists I lay there starting to feel tired. I feel like I have done the trick and I can finally go to sleep. Sure it's after midnight, but I was able to help myself get groggy. Hmm . . .

Finally, I lay my head down and whisper my prayers to Jesus. I thank Him for the day He has given me. I thank Him for my husband, my children, my family, my friends. I thank Him for our health and safety. I thank Him for the tiny, messy home I live in. And then I pray that He will help me to work harder next time. Help me have more motivation to get things done. And I also pray that my husband and children will always love and appreciate me. 

And then . . . my body relaxes. I feel Mr. Sandman bring me a dream. 

Two hours later I'm awakened by Phebe who is hungry and someone has to go potty. Oh well. 

There Will Be Blood

My children are early risers. They love to wake up before the sun and, well, wreak havoc.

My boys wake up anywhere from 6:45 - 7:00 a.m. They take this quiet time before the rest of the house is awake to eat a whole box of cereal or a whole loaf of bread. An early morning snack before breakfast, of course. 

I dread mornings. 

A few days ago my daughter came into my room and said, "Mom, the boys have blood all over their face." I jumped out of bed to find my boys playing in the living room, in the dark, with what appeared to be blood all over their face and arms.

I'm not going to lie to you. I was freaking out inside. I checked their bodies for gashes or something, all the while asking the boys what happened. Did they get in a fight? What in the world?!

It wasn't long before I decided to check their bedroom. Once I turned on the light I felt like I walked into a horror film. There was "blood" everywhere. Handprints all over the bedding, the walls -- there were even bloody handprints leading up to their window so I'm assuming they were hoping to flee the crime scene that way. 

Then I found it. 

The answer to all of my questions sat right in the middle of the floor. 

An empty jar of strawberry jam. 

One of these days, when my boys are older, they are going to pay for this. How, you may ask? 

I'm not sure yet. But I have this picture to remind me of all the craziness they put me through so I will never forget! 

Our first camping trip!

Last week we tossed around the idea of going camping over the weekend.  We almost didn't do it, but we knew we deserved a weekend getaway and the kids would have a lot of fun!  So we packed the car and made sure we were ready by the time Paul got off work on Friday and left for the most relaxing weekend ever!

 

Well...

 

We got lost.  We were almost to the lake when we took a wrong turn and drove a long time down the wrong road.  Whaddya gonna do.  We did get back on track and found where we were supposed to be.  Paul headed straight for the lake to go spear fishing and the kids and I went down to the beach! 

 



 

 

Max absolutely loved the water.  He didn't act afraid at all!  He enjoyed playing in the sand and water.  It was the perfect temperature too!  I enjoyed watching my kids play and have so much fun.  I enjoyed just sitting and knowing I didn't have to do anything!

 

Doesn't this look funny?  We're here in the mountains and there are seagulls!

 

Paul and Kirby didn't get any fish that night, but they had so much fun!  Can you tell?  They would try again the next day and still come back empty-handed, but they had a great time being out in the water and almost catching "the big one."

 

The scenery was just beautiful and I knew I had a very relaxing weekend ahead of me.  Laying around on the beach, reading my book, playing with my kids...it was going to be fantastic!  The kids did not act bored once -- sleepy, yes, but they were running around everywhere enjoying their first camping trip!

 

Zoe looks so funny in this picture, but it's the best I could take of her eating a s'more!

 

The kids were having a blast eating s'mores and being around the campfire!

 

Even baby Titus -- who didn't leave my side.

 

The next day we enjoyed a yummy pancake breakfast and waited for the sun to warm us up a little bit.  As soon as it got warm we got dressed and headed to the beach!  We spent many hours down there and it was wonderful!

 

Sometime in the afternoon we had to say goodbye to Paul's family.  The kids HATED to see them go, since we just got there.  We had fun with them the one day we got to see them!  Gram helped sweeten the sad moment with cookies, though.  That helped. :-)

 

Even Titus got a yummy cookie!

 

Here is a picture of my beautiful family on our first camping trip!

 

After we took our family picture we decided to take a walk by the lake.  While walking I noticed lightning on the other side of the hills and kept bugging Paul with my worries of a storm coming.  He assured me over and over that the wind was blowing the storm away from us.  No worries.

 

We got back to our tent and the wind had picked up some.  We decided to just go to bed and we were sure the wind would calm down soon.  The wind only got worse and worse, and guess what happened?  The lightning was right over top of us!

 

The wind ripped the rain cover part of the tent off -- I like to call it the roof -- and that kind of freaked the kids out, but I put them all to bed anyways while Paul got out of the tent to try to fix the problem.  This is what happened next...

 

Me: Ok kids, let's hold hands and say our prayers.  'Thank you, Jesus, for this wonderful day-"

 

A gust of hurricane wind came and completely leveled the tent with the kids and I in it!  You should of heard the screams of terror from the kids!  They were beside themselves!  It's actually pretty funny now!

 

Paul tried putting the tent together when I noticed a huge gaping hole in the wall of the tent.  Oh, did I forget to mention the borrowed tent?  ::sigh::  How disappointing.

 

We finally gave up once the lightning got worse and it started to sprinkle.  I packed up the kids real quick and then Paul and I packed up our camping area in the dark.  It seemed like it took forever, but we threw everything in the car and then left just as the rain started to pour.

 

We made it to Great Falls and we both were exhausted.  We found a hotel room on priceline and decided to head home the next morning.  We got to the room, put the kids to bed, and I headed to the bathroom to take a much needed shower.  Titus started to cry but I didn't even care, I wanted a shower so bad!  I went to start running hot water when I went looking for shampoo and conditioner.  There was none in sight!  There was soap, but no shampoo.  Then I noticed the sign that said any extras, like shampoo and conditioner, could be purchased at the front desk.  ::sigh::  So I gave up and rescued my crying baby who didn't calm down and go to sleep till 4:30 in the morning.

 



 

Paul got up in the morning and went to the continental breakfast to bring something back for the babies.  When he came back, he tossed a couple packages of muffins on the bed for the kids.  When I asked what they had for breakfast he said packaged muffins and fake fruit.  Haha!  Perfect!  The kids loved the muffins, so that is great!  They got something in their tummy and Mommy and Daddy headed for Starbucks.  Liquid breakfast. :-)  Yummy!

 



 

We spent the rest of the day in Great Falls and then headed home around dinner time.  Once we parked Zoe said, "Can we go camping again?"  I'm thankful they're not scarred!  As soon as we got home I threw all three babies in the tub!  I enjoyed my hot shower -- and my shampoo and conditioner.

 

So our weekend didn't work out the way we planned.  It kind of was a bummer.  But we had fun and we have some laughs about the kids' first camping experience!  Hopefully it will work out a little bit better next time.  Ha!



Naps Happen

 

We are still having nap issues with the new 3 year old.  But every once in awhile a nap will attack her when she least expects it.  The funny thing is, when she wakes up and you ask how her nap was, she will deny she ever took one!

 

Mom: Well hello, Zoe! How was your little nap?

Zoe: I didn't take a nap! ... I was resting my eyes.

 

She is so funny.  Just yesterday she fell asleep on me, and I moved her to her bed.  She slept for a long time!  When she woke up Paul asked how she slept, and again she argued with him saying she didn't take a nap.  Oh well!

Too big for naps

On the morning of Zoe's birthday (nearly a week ago) she woke up a different person.  It's almost like she realized she was now 3 so she was a big girl -- she is more independent, stubborn, and most importantly...she "is a big girl now, so no more naps!"  Her words exactly.

 

The thing you may not realize, though, is that naps means all sleep.  Including bedtime.  Every night since her birthday she has fought us hard about going to bed.  No matter how many times we explain mommy and daddy are going to bed too, she thinks that she needs to stay up all night and play while everyone else is tucked away waiting for Mr. Sandman.

 

 

Since she is "too big for naps" during the day she has been staying up with me while the boys go to bed.  She follows me around while I do my chores and then we will watch shows together while I fold clothes.

 

The past couple of days, though, if she gets too comfortable, she is attacked by an afternoon nap.  Shocker.  She snuggles up with a blanket, sweater, whatever is cozy enough, and she falls asleep right before dinner.  Too big for naps?  I think not!

 

Someone had suggested calling afternoon naps "quiet time" instead, and I think that's a great idea!  She can read books or play with her dolls in her room for awhile.  If she falls asleep, great!  If not, oh well.  It will give me a chance for quiet time too! :-)

 



Just when I get into a routine kids like to change it on me!  Good grief! ;-)

Some people don't like riding with the windows down.

On our way to Arkansas it was pretty wet and chilly. It was the complete opposite when we were on our way home! Almost the whole way we saw 90+ degree weather. It was great!

Paul and I had this GREAT idea of driving with all the windows down -- including the sun roof. We were having the time of our lives! Max on the other hand...

...was NOT having a good time. We were laughing so hard at Max with all the windows down! I was crying! I still look at this picture and laugh. He just wasn't having fun at all! 

Zoe had a great time, though! She loved it! She was giggling and clapping her hands like she was on an amusement park ride! She's just like her daddy. :-)

Since being home I have rolled the windows down just to see what Max does. He immediately covers his face with that here-we-go-again face! It cracks me up! 

No rolling down the windows today.. It is a chilly, rainy day. I don't mind it. :-) Perfect day to clean and watch movies while folding laundry! 

Daylight Savings

Source: imgfave.com via Grace on Pinterest

 

No sleeping in for this Mommy!  Thank you Titus and Daddy.

 

Happy Sunday!

My first Pinterest Project

I'm really excited about what I found on Pinterest this morning!  But first, I have to share this video with you.  Have you heard of Vine?  It's an app for recording videos.  I caught Zoe and Max fighting this morning, and normally as soon as they start swatting at each other I nip it in the bud.  But I saw some video opportunity that I may want to see when they're older. ;)

 

 

Crazy kids. :)  I laughed so hard I was crying!  I don't know why, but I just thought it was funny.

 

Anyways, yes, I have my first Pinterest Project!  Look at the picture below.

 

This is a toddler bed that is made out of pallets!  I don't know why, but it seems like pallet furniture is really popular right now.  Some pieces look really cool while others don't.  When I saw this I immediately saw Zoe!  We could even paint it a prettier color.  And notice the "shelving" under the bed?  Perfect for storing books, right?!  I am super excited about this project.  Paul has pallets at work so this is going to work out perfect!

 

I just hope we can do it soon...

Kids these days.

Zoe has been cracking me up lately!  She uses her Papa's iPad to watch Elmo -- she knows how to work it too!  Also, she swipes and taps the screen on our TV thinking that's how you work it.. like a touch screen phone.

The brightest thing I did as a kid was make a mud volcano using the hose to shoot water out like lava! O.O

One of those days

 

I don't mean to complain, but I've been having one of those days.  As a matter of fact, it's slowly turning into one of those weeks!  Don't worry, this won't be a woe-is-me kind of post.  I always try to find humor in everything that's going on in my life, but to be perfectly honest, I'm almost getting to the point of hysterical laughter and an eye twitch.  Won't I be funny to watch at my next Walmart trip?!

I'm totally kidding by the way.  The past couple of days have not been the best for me, but they could always be worse.  I'm still in a good mood (for the most part) and at the end of the day Paul and the kids always have me laughing!

We all fall into ruts here and there, though.  No biggie.  Life goes on!

How do you cope when having a bad day?  I just indulged in a couple of Reeses cups and now I feel like a heffer.  Maybe I'll take my babies and go for a walk up at the mall.  The chocolate made me feel better, though.

"Go away pain.."

Haha!  Oh my word, I'm JUST kidding!

I'm addicted

One of my cousins posted this on Facebook just for me.  I think it best describes my mornings. =)

Zoe woke up around 7:30 this morning and I felt just like Garfield.  I grumbled and complained all the way to the coffee pot.  Just one swig and I was a different person!

I love my magic potion I like to call coffee.♥

How do non-coffee drinkers function?!

What a boring life.. ;)

I think I've been addicted to coffee since before 2.  My Grandma Babe and Aunt B would slip me a spoonful here and there when they thought no one was looking.  I even remember being at a restaurant with my Aunt B and BEGGING her for a drink.  She finally let me take a drink from her mug and I remember thinking it was so heavenly.. that hot, vanilla flavored coffee..

When I worked at coffee shops I had access to all the coffee I wanted.  I took advantage of that.  My addiction got so bad I could drink a 10-shot caramel frappe without feeling a thing.  I don't even know if my own mother knows that!  Don't worry, Mom, I don't do that anymore..

I.  Love.  Coffee.

I now live in a town where 2-shots is risky.  If I told anyone what I used to drink back in the day they would fall over!  I love it hot, iced, strong, dessert-like, I don't care.

Paul and I are planning a trip to Great Falls soon.  Do you know what's first on my list?

Starbucks.

Morning Person vs. Night Owl



Source: meinlykkelig.blogspot.com via Nike on Pinterest

Zoe is a morning person.

She gets up between 7:00-8:00 every morning.

Mostly around 7:00.

Max is a night owl.

He doesn't really go to sleep till around 2:00-4:30.

Mostly around 4:30.

Mom is a zombie.

She drinks 4-6 cups of coffee, tea, coke to function.

Mostly around 6.

(I'm writing this while drinking a cup of iced Coke Zero.  Ha!)

Thrilled. To. Death.

Woo. Stinking. Woo.

As you can see from the picture above, I am thrilled. to. death. that I made it to 40 weeks.  I'm just jumping for joy.  Can you see it?  Can you see the thrill written all over my face?

Today is my due date.  From here on out I'll be overdue - and the thought makes me want to punch someone in the face.  Though it's a tough decision, I think I'll start with my doctor and work from there. =)

My next appointment isn't until Wednesday this week.  I've been going weekly on Tuesday long enough that changing to Wednesday for this week seems way too long to wait!  But don't worry, I don't see Max doing anything crazy before then.  So we'll wait for Wednesday to FINALLY get here in order to beg Dr. L to schedule an induction just to wait another few days.. maybe a week.. before that works out.

Jesus help me..

I need divine strength right now.  After my previous post talking about allowing God to be in contro, I felt more at peace about everything.  Sure I still felt disappoint every once in awhile, but I didn't allow myself to feel depression because I knew everything was in God's hands.

But let me just tell you a little something..

I am uncomfortable.  I find no relief in standing, sitting, or lying down.  Paul had to literally roll me over today because I could not do it by myself because I was so sore.  It makes me feel like a turtle on my back.  I am not a turtle, I'm a human being.  Humans shouldn't feel like upside down turtles.

I do not like to waddle.  I feel like a penguin.  I am not a penguin, I am a human being.  Humans should not waddle.

I have resulted to wearing sweat pants and my husband's t-shirts.  They may seem comfy, but I do not feel cute.  All of my maternity clothes are "shrinking" because I have never been this far along before.  I feel like a whale.  Again, I am not a whale - I am a human being.  Humans should not feel like a 100 ton mammal.  I want to wear MY jeans.

Here are just 3 examples of how I feel about arriving to my due date - and still no baby.

Water at my feet

I went to the bathroom for the 500+ time, flushed, and then proceeded to wash my hands.  Out of nowhere I felt water at my feet, and I immediately started thanking God because the time had come and we were ready to roll!

Wait a second..

I looked down and realized the water had not come from me.  My toilet had overflown and I was standing in the middle of Lake Peewater.

God has the funniest sense of humor.  He thinks so anyways. =)

Hormones

After my Castor oil incident I had previously written about, I took my second trip to the bathroom to finish throwing up what I had managed to chug down, as well as everything else I ate and drank to try and cover up that awful flavor in my mouth.

If violent puking does not cause contractions, I don't know what will.

I took a shower (to get the "contents" out of my hair) and then went back to bed.  After a quick 30 minute nap I think I'm feeling better..

Let's get one thing clear, though.  I am 38 weeks 5 days pregnant.  I am not oblivious to the fact that I have not reached 40 weeks yet.  If one more person tells me I'm still early or to be patient I'm going to freak out.  I'm serious.

I am a funny person.  The reason I keep you all posted on what I've done to try and induce labor as well as what has happened because of it is because I think it's funny and I want to share.  Don't you think I need a little humor in my life right now? ;)

As you can see Max is not here yet.  Though that is a little stressful to me, I know there is a reason why.  I pray everyday for a healthy son and I know that he still needs some "baking time" as some would like to say.  I would never wish harm on any of my children.  I accept that God is trying to teach me how to breathe and to stop and smell the roses.

Thanks for understanding.  Even if you don't, and you still think I need "advice".. I suggest you keep it to yourself.  Like I told my younger sister, "I'm this close to knocking those freckles off your face."  Just smile and nod.. or better yet, laugh with me! =)

Pay no attention to the hormonal pregnant woman behind the curtain..

An update on the Alexander clan

It's very rare to get a shot of Paul and I together.  I don't know why, but if anyone is getting their picture taken, it's Zoe. :)  So here's the most recent shot of Paul and I.. being ourselves.  Ha!

Ok, let me think about what all has happened since I last blogged.  This could turn out to be a novel!  Bear with me..

Paulywog

It seems like Paul has been a workaholic since we've been home from our trip.  Not because he wants to, though we don't complain when the paycheck comes.  Classes start up the 29th or 30th of this month and I think he's looking forward to it a little bit..  Some of the classes sound hard, but I hope the others make up for that.

Paul has been contemplating cutting his golden locks for awhile now.  He informed me a couple days ago that he couldn't decide what he wanted to do, so he flipped a coin.  The coin says to keep the longer hair and not get a haircut.  "Plus, what if Zoe didn't recognize me?" he says.  What a goofball!

ME

I had a doctor's appointment yesterday.  After waiting 2 hours Dr. Lien finally came in, checked me for group B, she said I was 3 cm dilated, but my cervix still thick.  Not what I wanted to hear.  Especially since she bumped me up two weeks!  So instead of being 34 weeks pregnant I am now 36 weeks.

Zoe was born at 37 weeks.

I'm not saying our little boy will be born next week, but it's definitely going to happen soon!  All I can say is.. THANK YOU JESUS!!  I am so ready for our son to be here.  I can't wait to kiss his face, count his fingers and toes, watch Zoe interract with him, etc.

Oh, and we have decided on a name..

Maximus Kirby Alexander

Isn't that awesome?  If you haven't figured it out yet, Paul and I try to go for names that are not common.  Though I met a dozen Zoes after Zoe was born!  We like different, unique names.  Plus we just love how Zoe and Max fit together.  Isn't that the cutest?!  Don't tell me if you think it's too weird.  I don't want to hear it. :)

It's too bad the name is already kind of long.  I wanted to name him Maximus Colin Kirby.. after both of our dads.. but my Dad will have to wait till the next boy.  I'm sure he understands. :)

Zoebelle

Zoe has 2 bottom teeth that are more visible when she talks, and I love seeing them!  She is so adorable when she tells her "stories" using her hand gestures and being so serious!  She still does the army crawl.  Paul says he's seen her actually crawl, but I haven't seen it yet.  Apparently she thinks army crawling is faster.  But, she has been walking around the coffee table, couches, dining room chairs, etc.  I hope she walks soon!  And talks.  She needs to learn more words other than "da-da" and "mom-mom-mom-mom."

Well, there is so much more stuff I could talk about, but it's getting late and Paul wants to watch Mars Needs Moms tonight. :)  Have a wonderful night!

What's going down

30 weeks 5 days
Taken at my inlaw's house

 So here's a picture I took yesterday after realizing -- yet again -- that I have been HORRIBLE about taking pictures with this pregnancy!  I hope my son doesn't feel neglected when he gets older.  At nearly 31 weeks I still forget that I'm pregnant.  What is wrong with me?

Zoe was born at 37 weeks, so I can't help but feel like this one will be born around the same time.  I shouldn't think that way, since every baby is different and comes at different times, but I can't see myself going any later then that.  Thankfully Dr. Lien induced me early so I'm sure she'll do the same again.  She is too amazing for words!!

Tomorrow I plan on taking advantage of my day off and cleaning my house as well as organizing all of the junk in the garage so I can ::hopefully:: have a garage sale this weekend.  I sure hope it works out!  I sure would like some extra spending $$$ for our upcoming trip to Washington for a wedding.  I'm in desperate need of Starbucks!  We'll see how it all goes down.  I want to do so much, but I know I need to listen to my body as well so I don't go into labor TOO early.  Thankfully I'll have Paul's cousin, Felicia, helping me out.

If you're lucky maybe I'll take some pictures tomorrow.  Seriously, if you're lucky.. =)

Our Sleeping Beauty

For those of you who don't know, I work from home.  Kinda.  I have a work-from-home job, but because I do not have internet at the house (yet) I work at my mother and father inlaw's.

Well, they just recently bought a dog bed.  Before the dog even had a chance to try it out Zoe claimed it as her own. =)  This is her new playpen.  As a matter of fact, she's playing in it right now as I type!

She knows how to climb out of the side, so IF she gets bored with her little area, she heads out to pull things off bookshelves, try to climb the stairs, or, her favorite, find hair balls to eat.  Yuck!

Zoe's first birthday is on Monday!  Can you believe it?!  We'll most likely have a pink/bubble party.  I think Mommy is more excited than she is, but she'll soon realize how exciting her party is going to be!

Welcome to my HUMBLE abode!

This is my floor.

And it's clean.

I don't know whose bright idea it was to invent white carpet, but whoever did should be drug out into the street and shot!  I should have taken a before picture but it was too disgusting and embarrassing to keep as a reminder!

We now have clean carpet, though, and I'm starting to think maybe I should set some ground rules in the house..

Would I sound like a total jerk and would you feel unwelcome if I asked you to take your shoes off before entering my house?

I know that people take their shoes off as soon as they get home to be more comfortable, but the minute someone else asks you to take your shoes off -- at their house -- that comfort you feel from taking your shoes off after a long, hard day vanishes.  Instead you start feeling insecure about feet smells, if your socks match (or don't match in this day and age), kicking yourself for not getting that pedicure you were thinking about getting for yourself a couple days ago, etc.

Forget it.  I may have just talked myself out of my own idea.